


Forgiveness

by The_Hawk_Eye



Category: Football RPF
Genre: Angst with a Happy Ending, Light Angst, M/M
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2015-03-09
Updated: 2015-03-09
Packaged: 2018-03-17 03:59:00
Rating: General Audiences
Warnings: Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings
Chapters: 1
Words: 1,110
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/3514541
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/The_Hawk_Eye/pseuds/The_Hawk_Eye
Summary: <blockquote class="userstuff">
              <p>Fernando left Madrid. Sergio felt abandoned without realizing that Fernando never left him behind. At the end it was him who left Fernando on his own</p>
            </blockquote>





	Forgiveness

**Author's Note:**

> Sorry for the title, I'm not good for that things

When Fernando said he was leaving Madrid Sergio knew he shouldn’t blame him for that decision but still he did. Sergio had seen how down Fernando was. He was sad because he couldn’t do anything for his team. Sergio had seen his tears after the match against Barcelona, they lost and some of his team mates were laughing because the result was bad for Real Madrid in la Liga. Sergio knew that Fernando was dying in Madrid but deep down he wished he was enough to relieve his pain. He loved him more than anything and that should have been enough. That was what he thought until Fernando told him he was leaving. So he got mad and blamed Fernando for trying to survive.

Sergio was a jerk that night and the following weeks.

Sergio felt abandoned without realizing that Fernando never left him behind. At the end it was him who left Fernando on his own. For days he didn’t answer his calls and ignored any attempt of communication. For a while it was really easy to ignore him till it wasn’t anymore. The rage disappeared and loneliness came and Sergio felt lonely and miserable.

And that’s why he’s waiting for Fernando in front of his door.

Sergio doesn’t know if Fernando is mad at him for ignoring his calls but that doesn’t matter. He’s in Liverpool to say how sorry he’s for everything he said and did, and to tell Fernando that he did the right thing leaving Madrid because he was dying and there was nothing that city that could have save him. Not even Sergio.

Love is not always enough and now Sergio knows that but that doesn’t mean they don’t love each other or that their relationship is going to end. Love wasn’t enough for Fernando to stay but it could be enough for them.

He sees Fernando coming. He looks great, a bit pale but that must be because the sun in England is not as warm as in Spain. Sergio expects Fernando to get mad at him, that’s what he deserves and that’s what he wants. But when Fernando sees him the first thing he does is to smile with relief which kills Sergio a little because he knows he doesn’t deserves it.

“You came” Fernando says with a soft voice. Sergio nods and waits for Fernando to open the door. When they’re inside the house Sergio kisses him and he knows it’s a mistake and that he shouldn’t be doing that but he can’t help, he has missed Fernando too much. “Forgive me” he pleads between kisses “Please forgive me. I know why you left. I know why you had to... Please forgive me”.

Fernando kisses him back. How long has he been waiting for that? How long has he been waiting for Sergio? How Long...? He hears every word Sergio is saying, every ‘forgive me’ whispered between kisses. It is like a dream for him after all those weeks. Sergio is with him again and Fernando feels complete and ready to give him back his heart one more time.

“I’m an idiot and I know I don’t deserve your forgiveness but...” Sergio is not sure about what he wants to say but he expects that Fernando understands him anyway like he always does. “I said horrible things but they’re not true... I just wanted to hurt you because I was scared and for a moment I thought I was the only one suffering...”. Sergio knows those words are not the best ones to be forgiven by Fernando but they are sincere and that’s what Fernando deserves, sincerity. “I only though in myself and I didn’t want to see you were in pain too... To make that decision must have been difficult for you. And when you needed comfort, you found recriminations from the person who should have supported you... But it was easier for me to blame you than to accept the reality...”

“And what is that reality” Fernando asks because he needs to know that Sergio understand.

“I wasn’t enough for you to stay” Sergio answers looking at him. He is not mad for that just sad. Life is how it is and they can’t change some things. Fernando needed to leave Madrid and that’s fine. “I couldn’t give you all you needed in Madrid”.

“Sergio... I don’t... I...” Fernando tries to say something to explain himself, to make sure Sergio understands what he feels for him.

“It’s fine Fernando” Sergio interrupts him. “Now I understand that it doesn’t mean you don’t love me more than anything. You never left me... which is ironic because although it was you who left Madrid and I blamed you for leaving me as well... It was me who did it. It was me who left you alone and the one who broke your heart and mine in the process”.

Fernando doesn’t want to see Sergio like that, suffering. But he can’t stop him. Since that night Fernando has been waiting those words like they were air because he was suffocating.

“So I know I don’t deserve it but please...could...?” Sergio can’t finish the sentence because Fernando’s lips are touching his.

“I forgive you... I forgave you long time ago” he says hugging Sergio. Fernando loves him more now if that’s possible. “I’m glad you’re here, I’m glad you didn’t ask me to forget those words because they’re part of our story. But I can forgive you. I want to and I want you to know that”.

“Thank you” whispers Sergio breathless and for the first time since Fernando left he feels in peace. He can’t forget those words either. To do that it would be like betraying Fernando and himself but it’s fine. They are stronger now and even if it is a painful memory it is the proof that they love each other even in the worst times and when one of them is being an idiot. To forget something doesn’t mean to get over it and the possibility to be hurt again is still there. None of them want to forget because that’s not how love works, that’s not the solution but a way of suffering in the future and Sergio doesn’t want to hurt Fernando like that never again. “Thank you”.

Fernando smiles and holds his hand. He doesn’t say anything but it’s not necessary. Sergio follows him to the bed. They still need to talk about a lot of thing but not tonight.

Tonight they want to be together like they have all the time in the world to love each other before the distance comes between them.


End file.
